10 Ways to Cope With Rejection When Buying a Horse

My offer for the 6-year old chestnut gelding I thought might be the one got shot down on Saturday. Via text message. Without any indication that there was another offer besides mine. So basically, my asking for a trial blew my horse hopes because the seller opted for the “cleaner” deal.

What to do in the wake of such sudden disappointment? Here’s how I coped Saturday afternoon/evening. If you find yourself in a similar disappointing situation, perhaps you can glean a few applicable tips from my experience.

1. Call mom. Rehash every detail of the soap opera from the vet check you were scheduling the following week, to the disbelief that you were kept in the dark with another offer being on the table. Express your fear that you will never find another horse, or that you will find another horse that you like even more but that said horse will be either A) too expensive or B) not sound.

2. Feel guilty that your greatest problem in life is that you can’t find a horse. Watch CNN clips showing religious and ethnic persecution in Iraq and add to the tears that so many people on the other side of the world are suffering so miserably.  Feel small and spoiled that you’re crying over a horse.

3. Surf Facebook.  Cruise through your friends and think about how you have such a diverse group of friends from high school friends you’re not even friends with anymore to former students who use language you don’t really want to read, to friends from barns in Illinois who are at a horse show this weekend. Feel sad that you’re not at a horse show this weekend. See New Vocations horses offered for adoption and feel sad they won’t adopt out west of the Mississippi River. See local California horse rescues posts and feel sad their horses are either too short or have restrictions such as “flat only.”

4. Call sister.  Repeat information from #1. Call mom. 

5. Play with your dogs. Think about how your dogs love you the most of anyone in the world and they are always happy. Try to be more like your dogs.

6. Get frozen yogurt with husband. Load up on creme brulee and sea salt caramel yogurt. Add caramel sauce, hot fudge, and whipped cream with Graham cracker bits sprinkled on top.

7. Go to Ulta and buy hair products. Purchase swirl cream that keeps waves in place. Try new product in same line that promises to boost waves that have lost waviness. Feel sheepish when picking up mail you notice package from Amazon containing same swirl cream (husband ordered per earlier request).

8. Go to Bed, Bath, and Beyond and buy robot floor mop you’ve had eye on for months. Think of all the money saved by not buying the horse and tell self that, “You’re worth it.” Feel good about using the 20% off coupon. Envision how much happier you’ll be having a robot vacuum and a robot floor mop. One can suck up the Golden Retriever hair and the other can wipe down his sneaky wet pawprints from the wood floor.

9. Call friend. Repeat information from #1 Call mom and #4 Call sister.

10. Tell self you’re taking a break from the horse search. After all, you’re going out of town for a week and then school starts up immediately upon return. Remind self this is bad timing to find a horse. Somehow while on the computer, fingers start typing in “dreamhorse.com” and “warmblood-sales.com.” Surf horses. Push chair back and exit the desk area. Play with dogs again and go to bed.

What techniques have you found effective for dealing with a significant disappointment whether horse-related or otherwise?

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