Ye Olde Jousting Nag, Penelope

Yesterday was Medieval Day at my middle school. Students left their books and backpacks at home along with their every-day clothes and came to school as knights, lords, ladies, and even priests. A certain jousting horse showed up as well…

Instead of going to math, science, English,etc., the seventh graders rotated to different classrooms set up as stations such as Black Death, Basket Weaving, Birds of Prey.

We hired an actual falconer man with his medieval posse of kilted folks with pretend accents to demonstrate the sport of hunting with birds. I didn’t know his owl would be tethered near my desk, and the gray bird with enormous eyes seemed to glare at me when I entered my room to grab a few items at the end of the school day.

I worked the Great Hall station which was essentially our cafeteria set up with banquet tables and decorations of shields and colorful banners on the walls.

As students rotated in to my station yesterday many of them approached me to say, “The bird pooped on your floor and the guy walked in it.”

Ew.

My colleague and partner at the Great Hall dressed as a Viking and led the groups of students through jousting, fencing, and crossbow marksmanship (don’t worry, none of the weapons were even remotely real).

With great dramatic flair, the Viking asked, “Has anyone here ever ridden a horse?” About a dozen hands shot up during each of the 7 periods. He waxed on about how only the wealthy knights could afford horses and we were going to give a few of them with riding experience a chance to practice this storied tradition.

“Ms. Friedland is a horsewoman and she’ll give you some riding tips,” he’d say and pass the microphone over to me.

“First, don’t ever look down. If you look down, do you know where you’ll end up?” Some of them got it- “You’ll fall.”

“Also, remember to breathe. If you’re tense, your horse will be tense,” and then we carried on about how Penelope the jousting horse was a little fiery.

“She’s really a stunning horse. Very beatiful. You’ll love her,” I played it up.

Next I’d walk into the storage room (off stage), out of view of the students and when I said (into the microphone), “Hi Penelope, how are you, pretty girl?” the Viking played a horse snorting and whinnying sound effect.

I then rolled good ol’ Penelope out and trotted her past the long rows of banquet tables, stopping her to nuzzle a few students.

Penelope’s paper mache head has seen better times and I joked that Penelope should perhaps be renamed VanGogh due to her missing ear. Her good ear is broken and falls down after being placed upright.

Once the Viking selected a brave knight, the student hopped on the “horse” and took her for a lap to warm up. I played a galloping hooves soundtrack as the adolescent zigzagged around the floor of the cafeteria, attempting to build up momentum to gallop.

Then the Viking brought out the lance which was really a long piece of PVC pipe with blue tape spiraled around it. The student had to balance the unwieldy “weapon” and then ride Penelope down to the other end of the cafeteria where a cross-shaped stand held a salad plate sized-ring.

Some of the knights missed completely; others successfully snatched the hoop from the stand. One or two had minor falls–more like emergency dismounts– where they realized at the last minute they could not steer and so they stood up and the bike fell underneath them.

A few times Penelope’s head flew out of the pink basket from which she was protruding. Laughter erupted from the middle school audience. One time this happened the Viking (who is actually of Italian descent) made a joke about The Godfather.

At the end of the day I said I wanted to ride Penelope and so I hiked up my borrowed Robin’s egg blue medieval gown and mounted the pink beach cruiser. I could not get my legs to pedal without the skirt getting caught up so I Fred Flinstoned the pretend horse down the center of the Great Hall.

This morning a sweet 7th grade girl shared,“Yesterday I thought there really was a horse in there, until I heard the sound effect.” Someone else mentioned we should have a real horse next year.

Not a bad idea.

In fact, one of my colleagues owns a Mustang he and his daughter adopted a couple of years ago. And our school is only about two miles from Santa Anita Racetrack. Maybe I’ll see if. . .

Have you ever had an animal pay a visit to your school? Do you remember any special theme days where the “regular” subjects were replaced by something special?

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